


Dungeons and Gadgets

by Sherbet_Bxby



Category: South Park
Genre: Alternate Universe - Stick of Truth (South Park), F/M, M/M, South Park: The Fractured But Whole
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-20
Updated: 2021-03-10
Packaged: 2021-03-17 04:29:04
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,393
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29587254
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sherbet_Bxby/pseuds/Sherbet_Bxby
Summary: The stick of truth is the provider of the prosperous kingdom, what happens if it went missing?
Relationships: Eric Cartman/Kenny McCormick, Kyle Broflovski/Stan Marsh
Comments: 2
Kudos: 5





	1. Chapter 1

Being a king was no easy task. The young king, Kyle Broflovski learned this the hard way. Since he was a kid, he was told that the kingdoms bountiful crops and safeness came from his family’s treasure. No not just any kind of treasure, but the gift that the gods made. It was...the stick of truth. They king remembered that when he was a kid his father had told him that the stick was their source of power. That they must do what they can to protect it, in return, the gods and the stick would protect them. Nothing bad can happen to it. For fifteen years he was told this, now here he was twenty and the stick was still safe.

Kyle sighed as he wakes up to a knock on his door. His eyes opened as he begrudgingly sits up and he grabbed his robe. He stops in front of the mirror to make him somewhat presentable. Kyle looked into it and was still getting used to how he looked. Elves change appearance really fast as they grow. Since Kyle was changing into an adult elf he had the soft yet strong facial features and his hair fell to his shoulders. His dark emerald eyes looked back to him. You see, Kyle is a strong leader, very kind and compassionate. He tries to practice his scowling because his adviser, Cartman the gay- uhh Grand wizard Cartman, told him that he’s too nice. He needed to toughen up if he wanted to be a better ruler. Kyle could be intimating if he wanted but he always let people talk and explain themselves. After all there are two sides to every story. The king heard the knock again, pulling him from the train of thoughts and he goes over to the door. He opens it and was surprised to see his right hand man. 

“Ah Sir Marshwalker...what can I do for you? The sun is barely up. Is everything alright?” He asked as he looked over the other in front of him.

Head knight Marshwalker was a year to the king’s junior. Face serious and hair was loosely framing his face. His icy blue eyes, the bluest that Kyle has ever seen. Stanley also was fit, muscular yet a small frame, similar to Kyles physique. He was raised by the elves when they had found him abandoned in the wilderness as a baby. He was practically one of the elves. He respected them and they trusted Stanley. There was always an understanding. His armor was the colors of the protected, purple and green. The purple was the standard royal color, the green was a sign of peace. 

“Good morning my Lord, I’m sorry to wake you but there’s an emergency meeting in the high council room. There seems to be a problem. Princess Kenny had sent me to fetch you.” The ravenette said as he did a small bow. He may be a friend to the king but he always will use proper respect. He felt that the king deserved that. He almost pitied him, it must if been hard having to be king at the age of fifteen...loosing both of your parents as well..almost something out of a Shakespeare tragedy. 

The fiery redhead nods,”I see, well let’s get going Marshwalker.” He said as grabbed his staff and he puts a hand on the knights shoulder. The king said a few words in the elven tongue and they immediately were in the council room. It wasn’t a big council, it consisted of five people. All appointed because they all were worthy of it. 

Grand wizard Cartman, short and wide, his hair was a light brown and he kept it short. he may be something of a jack ass but he proved himself in the battle of Kingdom of Kupa Keep. When he risked his life fighting some douchebag dragon born. Someone who they thought they could trust to watch over the stick of truth, he then tried to destroy it. He nearly destroyed the grand wizard but the king had transferred some of his life force into the big boned fighter. Sure he wasn’t happy about having Jew magic helping him but it kept him alive and helped him defeat the dragon born. He wore the same colors as Stan, also protected 

Princess Kenny, tall and slim, she was on the council because of her ability to ally the woodland critters and deceive human men. Kyle didn’t like to lie but it’s useful for information. Princess Kenny was a kind lady of the castle. Her blonde hair hung down to her mid back. She was soft spoken and only really talked when spoken to, at least in public. She’s known for spreading Syphilis around town. She wore a black and red dress. Her black crown resting on her head as she was messing with her..stuffing in her dress. Kyle wasn’t sure what to call it. Kenny got a lot of weird looks from the villagers in the kingdom for her choices but they damn well understood that SHE will be protected and respected. Sure it might be new but what Kenny wants to be called, Kyle would make sure of that. One time a drunk elf was harassing Kenny and Kyle immediately had him taken to the town square and had him in a yolk to be an example of to respect others.

Paladin Butters, he’s kind of a pushover, but he works hand and hand with friar Maxi being the guardians of the stick. His short blonde hair was kept with a simple style. He didn’t stay in the castle with the others, he lived out in the church with friar Maxi. It was about a half hour walk from the entrance of the castle. Kyle only saw him each Sunday for the services. Growing up with him was entertaining for sure, the boys would always play pranks on him. They grew out of it around the time that Kyle became crowned the new king after his parents had died. 

Kyle wondered what was going on and he sits at his head chair at the table. Stan sat at his right and Cartman at his left. Kenny beside butters..wait- that’s not right.  
“Where’s Paladin Butters?” He asked as he looked at the other three. Telling by the grim faces the news wasn’t good.  
Princess Kenny fidgets with a ring she was wearing and looked up at Kyle. “My Lord...it seems that he is missing. This morning Grand Wizard was going to visit the friar and paladin and noticed the door of the church was open and when he stepped inside, he saw friar maxi was dead. The herbalist declared that he was poisoned. To make matters worse, paladin Butters is missing...and so is the Stick of Truth.” She said that last bit with a crack in her voice.

Stans eyes were wide with shock in disbelief,”Do you think maybe Butters was possibly kidnapped?” He asked as he looked around the table. “What are we going to do? The stick is gone-“ he was cut off by Kyles voice.

“This is what we are going to do...we will calmly take care of this. The information doesn’t leave this room tell no one. Kenny? I need you to do your talking with the critters of the forest, listen to the trees..see if you can get any information. Cartman, you need to go back to the church, see if you can trace any magic. Let me know what you find. Stan, get a carriage ready, we are going to tell the gate keeper of the city we are shutting the gates so no one can leave. We will figure out what’s going on. We can’t assure that Paladin butters is behind this. But don’t be too trusting. Use your best judgment.” He said as he turned to look at the oil panting of his family. He felt like he failed them. He should of died with them. That’s what he tells himself. If he had-

“Kyle?” The king jumped as he felt a hand on his shoulder. He whipped around to see who scared the living daylights out of him. He sighed a breath of relief when he saw it was his best friend. “Sorry I didn’t mean to scare you...” he chuckled softly. Kyle opened his mouth before he was cut off by Stan. “Don’t worry.. no one is here. It’s just us at last.” He smiled as he wrapped his arms around Kyles neck and looked up at him blushing. Kyle grins,”You still need to be careful..what if someone walked in on us?” He said as he wrapped his arms around stans waist pulling him close and filling the gap. The knight chucked as his face turns red. “You know fully well that wouldn’t stop us.” Kyle smiled as he leaned in to kiss his knight before.

“Kyle wake up...” he heard as he felt a light shake. “I have the carriage ready. My apologies that it took longer than usual, the stable boy was sick so I had to get the horses ready myself.” He said before pausing. “Are you ky? You seem red. Shall I take you to the physician?” “Nono...it’s alright I uhh..I’m fine.” He said as he tried to forget the dream he had. It wasn’t the first he had and definitely won’t be the last. “Let’s get going..” he said as he fumbled with his robes, nervously that is. He hoped he wasn’t obvious. If he was, Stan never told him. Soon enough they were at the gates and Kyle made sure to use discretion with the guards and told them that it was needed for the safety of the kingdom. That seemed to be a good enough excuse.

Meanwhile Cartman was making a potion and it would be able to detect any unfamiliar magic. Sure enough, there was. “The the fuck?” He big boned wizard saw Kenny passing by and he called her over,”Hey Kinnie... look at this.” He said as he showed her the murky brown color. Kenny’s face pales as she saw the potion. “Cartman...that’s not good. That’s a very bad omen....that means.. oh shit-“ she paused as she came to a realization. “There’s a bridge to another universe...that’s what your potion is saying...we need to go look for it. It can’t be too far from here.” She said as she puts a vial out to take some of the potion. “It will glow once we are near it..” she said as she grabbed Eric’s hand and they soon chanced to the cemetery. The vial started to glow a bright green.”here it is.” She said as she starts uncap the vial and poured it on the ground. Where the liquid landed, the earth crumbled until there was an underground staircase revealed. At the end was a door.

“What the fuck...Kenny..how did you know about this?” Eric asked stupidly just speechless that his best friend was a genius. She laughed as she looked at Eric,”You pick up on a few tips and tricks in hell..” she snickers as she smiled at him.”Come on..let’s go tell Kyle.” She said as she does a high pitch whistle to call over a horse. She was sure that she heard Cartman mutter a “horse girl” comment.


	2. Chapter 2

On the other side of the door...

“Alright what were we called in for Coon? I have things I could be doing instead of sitting around here listening to you ramble on about dumb shit.” Human kite said as he rolled his eyes annoyed. 

A snicker was released from across the table from Toolshed,”Yeah seriously...I could be spending this time scavenging for awesome stuff dude.” The ravenette remarked as he put his feet up on the table. Toolshed was one of the members for the coon and friends, best friends with Human Kite. They always worked together, in more ways than one. Kite loved how the gears lined up to sheds neck and up to one eye, it was kinda like a sexy cyclops thing going on. His other eye was fine of course and was icy blue as ever. His clothes were slightly dirty from motor oil and dirt. It’s a hard life here after the war, who knew Professor Chaos would convince the new recruit to join him? It wasn’t fair. Most of the team was gone. It was just them.

“I’ll have you know I was in the middle of solving a case, what the hell was so important that you had to have us immediately come here?” Mysterion growled as he stepped out of the shadows. His eyes burning with anger. He didn’t like being told to drop what he was doing. It irked him immensely. 

Now it was Coon’s turn to roll his eyes,”Geez kite get the sand out of your vagina….give me a few minutes and you can go back to be sheds pillow princess.” He laughed and ducked nearly avoiding the laser beams kite shot at him. “Okay fine, I just got back from chaos’s base, I found something that will finally end all of chaos and his henchmen...I present to you, the cube of destruction.” He said as he put the colorful cube on the table. “With this, we can finally have peace from them and maybe restore the town.” He stated. 

Mysterion looked at the cube,”How do you know that will actually do that? What if he wanted you to find it Coon?” He said as he crossed his arms. Mysterion was skeptical of anything, perhaps it’s because he had it rougher then the others. His blonde hair was tucked away in a cap and his face was covered with a wrap, you could only see his blue determined eyes. 

Their leader lets out a laugh,”Trust me...I want this freedom more than anything...who knows? Maybe we can take on and liberate other lands.. in the name of Coon and friends. We will be victorious and finally defeat professor chaos!” He smiled as he took the cube and put it in a jar and on a shelf. 

Kite frowns,”I don’t believe you just waltzed into the damn base and got this cube of destruction without getting caught…” he scoffed. Kite never trusted coon, but if the two believed him, he would follow. 

Toolshed paused,”Maybe they had something going on, besides Mysterion, coon is the most stealthy...it’s okay kite. We have to consider the possibility that this is true and we can restore the balance of humanity.” He smiled at the other. 

“Save your love fest on your own time...speaking of. That’s all for today, you’re free for now..” Coon said dismissing them.

Kite flipped off Coon as he walked out of the junkyard and he waited for Toolshed,”God I hate him...remind me why we have to work with him? Don’t actually remind me I know. I wanna hold onto this hate for a little bit.” He said as he grins at his partner. “It will come in handy for later..you know the Coon was wrong about who the real pillow princess Is…” Kite joked feeling his face turn a soft shade of red.

Toolshed blushed a bright red,”Kite!” He said sheepishly, playfully shoving the redhead,”I’d prefer if our team didn’t know I’m a bottom..” he laughed as he kissed Kite's cheek. “I went hunting last night, so I can cook us a nice meal…” he smiled proudly as he held Kite's hand in his.

Kite smiled and he looked at him, he was happy he had shed, they had each other since they were kids, eventually their friendship developed into a romantic relationship. They’ve been together for five years, since Kite was fifteen and shed was fourteen. Since then, they were inseparable. They even had the same camping area. Kite's old base, it has been fixed up with parts and was a better living situation. Against popular belief, Kite and Shed actually been together how couples get together, he was asexual, only Shed knew about it and he respected him for telling. He reassured Kite that wasn’t an issue and he loved kite for Kite. Toolshed wasn’t the type to get in people’s pants like some sleaze ball. 

Soon enough they get to the campsite and get settled in. Kite starts to go to the pantry area and he starts to prep some side dishes. Some potatoes and canned vegetables that were mixed, it wasn’t much but it’s something edible that they got from the store. He turns the radio on and starts to hum along to the lyrics, just in his own little world.

Meanwhile Toolshed was preparing the makeshift grill he created and they were going to have Sheds special steak. He uses a secret seasoning recipe that’s been passed down through the years. He walked back in and he saw Kite swaying to the music. He chuckled quietly as he walked behind him and hugged him from behind as he kissed the back of his head. “I’m offended, you started the party without me.” Shed laughed and he spun Kite around as he held one of his hands and laid his other hand on Kites waist. He smiled happily at him,”Now it’s a party honey.” He said as he gently swayed with his partner.

Kite gasped at the sudden feelings of being held but relaxed knowing it was Toolshed,”You really should announce yourself...I could have killed you.” He said as he kissed the others lips. He loved this, the little spontaneous cute moments like this, they can last a lifetime. He lets out a giddy laugh as he is spun around and dipped by Shed. 

“Perhaps. But it’s fun surprising you..and you love it.” He said as he lifted Kite up and he kissed him. “You can’t deny it either..” he said as he pulled away grinning. “You know...I was thinking about us and I think-“ Shed was cut off by the sudden darkness from the window. “What the fuck?” He let’s go of Kite and he looked up out the window. “This doesn’t look good or normal...you think a storm is coming or should we alert Mysterion?”

Kite sighed,”No need...I’m sure he’s seen it by now. It’s not every day the sky turns green and purple like that. Let’s just relax tonight? We’ve been so busy working..I miss you Shed.” Kite said as he in turn hugs Shed from behind. “We will have a nice dinner and that fancy wine you love.”

“How do you know how to get my favorite things? The store was raided ages ago..there was nothing left.” He laughed as he put his hands on top of Kites. “You’re right. I’ll stay in tonight. Just the two of us.”

Kite smiled and kissed Shed's cheek,”I have my ways. You know I’d do anything for you. You’re perfect, this plan sounds perfect. Fuck the Coon. I just want to feel like a normal couple for once.” He said as he let go of Shed and continued to cook.

For a split second, Shed felt cold and shivered slightly. “I’m gonna start a fire...I think there’s a hole somewhere that’s letting a breeze in.” He gathers up some firewood and he starts a fire in the fireplace. “Did you call me?” He asked looking over at Kite. 

Kite shakes his head,”No babe I didn’t say anything..you’re hearing things.” He said chuckling to himself,”just wake up.” He said looking at Shed.   
Shed looked over, slightly startled,”What?”  
Kite laughed again,”You know..wake up, be aware of your surroundings.” He says as he starts to cook the vegetables.  
Shed nods as he fidgets with a gear,he chuckled to himself thinking about how Kite used to call them gadgets. Not knowing the real name, it was cute because anything Kite didn’t know he’d call them gadgets. Shed shivers again,”Fucking fire isn’t doing shit babe..” he said as he starts to mess with it. 

“Wake up Stan.” Said the voice again.

**Author's Note:**

> Hey guys, this is my first time creating a fic of my own, I’m looking for any positive feedback you may have. Wishing a happy time zone wherever you may be. ^^


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